


you're all i need (underneath the tree)

by sanacult



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Dialogue Heavy, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Sharing a Bed, The Author Regrets Nothing, actually only one, just a stupid christmas romcom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-18
Updated: 2019-12-18
Packaged: 2021-02-26 10:48:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21848452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sanacult/pseuds/sanacult
Summary: If you asked Kuroo how he ended up at Oikawa's house for Christmas pretending to be his boyfriend, he honestly wouldn't know how to answer.
Relationships: Kuroo Tetsurou/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 6
Kudos: 140
Collections: Fave Haikyuu fic





	you're all i need (underneath the tree)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dimitris](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dimitris/gifts).



> u ever get hit with an idea and it wont leave ur head until u spend like three allnighters on it? yeah thats basically how this fic went. 
> 
> i feel like we all needed oikuroo being pining fools during christmas
> 
> EDIT: 21.12.20 — got rid of the lapslock, fixed the formatting

If you asked Kuroo how he ended up at Oikawa's house for Christmas, pretending to be his boyfriend, he honestly wouldn't know how to answer. Was it because he was offered enormous amounts of food? Or because he had nothing better to do? Probably a combination of both. 

The thing was, he'd rather visit the Oikawa household  _ without  _ having to pretend he's been dating Tooru for the last six months. Now, it wasn't that he was against the idea — he just knew how  _ nosy _ Oikawa's mom was and was worried that they were about to be found out the minute they entered the house. 

"Just let me do most of the talking and she won't even notice we're lying," Oikawa had told him when they were still in the car, going over the whole scheme again. 

"It's your mom. Wouldn't she be the  _ first _ person to know you're lying? You know, she could probably even guess how long you've slept." Tooru looked at him like a five year old who just found out Santa doesn't exist and then slammed his head on the dashboard with a loud groan. 

"Well fuck, there goes a week wasted on planning this whole thing. Nevermind, we're just going to go with the flow and we'll see how it turns out." He sat up straight again and put on his hat. "Anyway, do you have the ring for mom?" 

"Yeah. don't have a box though, so I'll try to figure something out inside." Tooru made him stop at the jewelers on their way because he forgot to buy something for his sister, so Kuroo decided to also buy something, not wanting to show up empty handed. It wasn't anything special; a simple silver ring with a white rhinestone. 

Oikawa nodded and got out of the car, basically running to the front door. Kuroo didn't have that privilege, as he wore black shiny shoes instead of typical winter boots, and the path from the car to the door was covered in a thick layer of ice. When he was close to Tooru, the latter rang the bell and waited with a smile on his face. His cheeks were pink from the cold wind and Kuroo saw his hands tremble before Oikawa hid them in his pockets, but he seemed too happy to care. 

The house was richly decorated, with colorful Christmas lights everywhere and various ornaments hung on the trees in front of the building. Kuroo was sure he also spotted some figurines of Santa and other Christmas related characters, followed by a big  _ Merry Christmas  _ sign on the door.  _ Festive.  _

Tetsuro took out the ring from his coat pocket, examining it again. With every next stare it looked less and less like a good present idea. "Actually do you think she'll like—" before he could finish, he slipped on one of the three little stairs of the porch. Luckily, he managed to save himself from falling further than his knees with Tooru's help. He held onto the ring tightly, afraid it would fall and he'd lose it in a pile of snow next to the stairs. 

"If I knew she wouldn’t, i wouldn't let you buy it, so of—" the door swung open, revealing Tooru's younger sister. "—course." 

The scream the girl let out could probably wake up a dead man. She quickly ran back inside and shouted something that dangerously sounded like  _ propose.  _

_ Oh no.  _

Tooru's eyes widened. They fucked up. 

"Go with the flow, was it?" Kuroo snorted. He seemed to be rather entertained by the whole thing, meanwhile Tooru was already losing his mind, and they haven't even entered the house yet. 

"Just— get up before they all come here, we might get away with this if it's only Himari who saw." He pulled Tetsuro up, trying to not lose balance himself. Kuroo seemed to stand up properly only to slip again, this time clutching Tooru's jacket and pulling him down with himself. "I'm going to kill you one day." 

The rest of his threats was disturbed by a large group flooding onto the porch. 

"Tooru! you could've hurt him!" 

"Nice to see you too, grandma," he muttered, slowly standing up and pulling Tetsuro up as well. The taller immediately gripped his wrist and put the ring on his finger. A second later Tooru felt cold fingers intertwine themselves with his.

"Safety measures." Tetsuro gave him a shit eating grin and carefully got to the rest of the Oikawa family. 

Tooru was  _ so  _ going to kill him.

* * *

Since they went inside, Tetsuro had at least six people welcome him to the family. Tooru was afraid he'd cancel the whole plan once it got out of hand, but surprisingly he was handling the situation even better than him. 

"Doesn't look like it's your first time doing something like this," he whispered when the kids pulled them to decorate the christmas tree. They seemed to be a bit intimidated by Kuroo at first, but once Tooru sent them a reassuring smile they warmed up to him. 

"I've been at Kenma's house for Christmas every year since I was eight. His family was very similar to yours." Kuroo busied himself with picking ornaments from several boxes around him. He had to admit Oikawa's family really knew how to prepare for the holidays. 

Tooru nodded his head and started to hang the decorations Kuroo was handing him, occasionally helping his cousins reach higher branches. He didn't even notice he started swaying along to the songs playing on the radio until Tetsuro joined him, humming quietly. They exchanged small smiles and continued to dress the tree (which was  _ large _ in Kuroo's opinion). 

"To-chan! The star!" Tetsuro looked down — a little girl was holding up a giant gold star and staring directly at Tooru. She looked like she was around five and was a copy of one of Tooru's aunts. The brunet smiled and crouched down. 

"Don't you think we should put the star on at the end, Akari? It's going to be a great finale." She puffed her cheeks in response and went over to Kuroo. 

"Will you help me then?" Tooru sent Kuroo a stare. "Don’t be a meanie like To-chan!" Tetsuro snorted and picked the kid up. 

"You're right, To-chan's a  _ big _ meanie, bet he didn't get any presents from Santa?" 

Tooru gasped. "The audacity… I’m Santa's favorite. If there's someone who didn't get any gifts, then it's you!" 

Before they could argue any more, Tooru heard his name being called from the kitchen. He wasn't really sure if leaving Kuroo with a bunch of kids and glass decorations was a good idea, but he didn't really have a choice. Eventually, he settled on standing in the kitchen door, where he could keep an eye on them. 

His mom made him taste a bunch of different cookies and cakes and tell her his opinion (which was the same every time — _Fl_ _awless, can I eat the leftovers from the cream?)._ After the nth try he averted his gaze to check up on the kids and the  _ bigger _ kid. 

Kuroo was holding Akari up as she excitedly put the star on the top of the tree. She giggled and hugged him around the neck, while the others jumped around them, demanding to be picked up too. He even spotted some of the shyest ones that hardly ever talked to strangers. 

Tooru smiled softly under his nose and leaned on the doorframe. He figured it was only natural for Tetsuro to be good with kids since he basically took care of Kenma for most of the time (and the guy really acted like a spoiled ten year old sometimes, a common setter trait). It was also nice to see him have fun, even if it meant listening to his god awful hyena laugh. He's known Kuroo since their third year in high school, when they met during nationals and he could tell what he was feeling even after a single gaze, and the situation they were in was  _ definitely  _ stressing Kuroo out. 

"You're staring." He flinched at his sister's voice. Himari was standing next to him, her eyes focused on the christmas tree. She was smiling exactly like Tooru was a second ago. 

Of course he wanted to disagree at first, to shake his head and call Himari stupid, but he was supposed to act like he  _ wanted  _ to stare. Well, there goes another drop in the ocean of lies made for his perfect scheme. Tooru turned to her and smirked. "And what about it? He's my  _ fiance _ , I have every right to." As to prove his words, he lifted his hand up to show her the ring shining gracefully on his finger. 

"Nothing." Tooru let out a relieved sigh in his mind. "He'd make a good father, don't you think?" 

"I guess? He's good with kids, that's all." 

Himari nodded her head. "Are you going to adopt in the future?" Tooru choked.  _ Of course _ she had to drop a bomb like this. He cleared his throat and looked at Kuroo again, this time swirling around with Yui in his hands. 

"We never talked about it before, but I think he'd want to." Great, their stupid conversations at three in the morning just saved his ass. "Why'd you ask?"

"Just because." 

Tooru raised one eyebrow. "You're sure it's not grandma trying to fish out some info through you?" Himari giggled at his words and went to the dining room, leaving him staring at the floor.

* * *

When Kuroo finally got away from the kids, it was only because it was way past their bedtime and they didn't have the energy to cling onto him anymore. 

He hadn't seen Tooru ever since he went to the kitchen which was hours ago, so he decided to find his bedroom on his own. Well, that certainly would've been a good idea if it wasn't for the fact that the house was  _ huge _ . He was deciding on which side of the hall upstairs to check, when Tooru's grandmother walked out of one of the rooms. She smiled at him and came closer. 

"Looking for something, sweetheart?"

"Yes, actually. I, uh, don't know where Oi— Tooru's bedroom is." _Great, let them know you're bluffing just a few hours in. Way to go, Tetsuro,_ he told himself. 

"It's on the end of the hall. This way." She pointed towards the door with a shaky finger. "Two rooms from mine,” she added and took Tetsuro's arm. The cold fingers made Kuroo jump slightly, which earned a small chuckle from the woman. "Tooru's are this bad too, isn't that right?" 

_No_ , he thought, _Tooru's are definitely_ _worse._ It was almost as if he had ice cubes instead of fingers and it honestly wouldn't be a problem for Kuroo if it wasn't for the fact that Oikawa liked to use him as a personal heater at all times. Be it after practice, during their study sessions or even in the middle of a game — it didn't matter. If Oikawa wanted to warm his hands, he'd immediately put them on Kuroo's arms or back. And, no matter how often that happened, Kuroo still yelped every single time. He was actually convinced Tooru did it for that reason alone, because he was an awful sadist and Tetsuro was an easy target considering they shared a room. 

But of course he wasn't about to ramble about Tooru's hands to his grandma, so he just settled on a small nod and started to follow her. 

Tooru's room looked very… Tooru-like even before entering; the door was full of stupid stickers with aliens and volleyball, which were two things he'd never shut up about even after being choked with a pillow. In the middle there was a big  _ giant king  _ written, covered in a bunch of silly drawings.  _ So even Shrimpy got to visit before him?  _

Tetsuro shook his head and entered the room, hoping to find some spare pajamas. He looked around, spotting a drawer in the corner. A success at first try; he picked clothes around his size and got up, immediately spotting Tooru's cluttered desk. 

It was full of books, some open and some stacked on top of each other with a bunch of bookmarks in them, loose pens threatening to fall from the surface any minute, some miscellaneous things like keychains or broken hairclips, and  _ lots _ of pictures. Well, curiosity might have killed the cat, but Kuroo was not in Nekoma anymore, so he picked up the closest stack of them. 

Oikawa's years in Seijoh, mostly the third year. Maybe he would even find pictures of himself if he looked long enough? So far it's only been Oikawa with his classmates, Oikawa with Iwaizumi, Oikawa with his team, Oikawa with Iwaizumi, Oikawa with Hinata and Kageyama, Oikawa with Iwaizumi… maybe he didn't deserve to be printed out? Considering Tooru's personality, he might have. He hoped the other stacks would have even a blurry bit of his face on them, but it was all Iwaizumi. 

Now, Tetsuro wasn't jealous, but it hurt his pride a little to see that Tooru had not a single picture of his best friend printed out, but his shitty ex had a few stacks. Yes, he was definitely still mad at Hajime for dumping Oikawa right before they were about to tell Tooru's parents about their relationship a year ago. He'd never seen Tooru in such a bad state, and yet he still insisted that it was  _ fine _ and that Iwaizumi had  _ no bad intentions,  _ which made Kuroo want to beat the guy up even more. 

But to think Oikawa still wasn't over him? He seemed like he moved on few months before, so was he just playing pretend and secretly crying in his room during the weekends he spent at home? 

He heard the door open and quickly crouched down to pick up a pencil laying under the chair. 

"What… are you doing?"

"Picking up a pencil? Your room is very messy, do you even clean it?"  _ Nailed it.  _ Tooru sighed and came closer to kick him in the thigh. 

"Bathroom's free. I advise you go there before Himari enters."

* * *

Thinking in the shower should be illegal. Thinking about  _ Oikawa  _ of all people in the shower should be illegal. Tetsuro wanted nothing more than to slam his head on the hard tiles, but he still had to wash his hair. 

Was he invited because Oikawa wanted to show his family he moved on? Or because he wanted to make Iwaizumi jealous? Maybe both? and if so, then why didn't Tooru tell him everything and instead acted like everything was okay and that he just needed to show his family that he had his life together? They were best friends, after all. 

Or was Kuroo just overreacting and making up his own theories that were in no way correct, simply because something as stupid as a stack of pictures annoyed him? No, he was definitely not admitting that one, even if it seemed logical. 

Tetsuro closed his eyes. "Christmas is not the time to think about someone else's exes. Show them your festive spirit, Tetsu," he whispered and turned off the water. 

After he was done changing and walked out of the bathroom, he saw Himari waiting in the hall. "Thank God you're out! I thought you died there for a second." She quickly went inside and slammed the door shut, leaving Kuroo with his mouth hung open. The Oikawa siblings sure were a duo. 

Tetsuro went back to the bedroom and was met with Tooru standing in the center of the room, contemplating something. He sat on a chair and swirled around. "Something bugging you?" 

Oikawa turned his head into Kuroo's direction, as if he just noticed his presence in the room. He scratched his chin and hummed. "There's only my bed here, all the futons are taken and one of us sleeping on the couch is out of the question." 

"Well then, i hope you don't kick a lot in your sleep." Kuroo flopped onto the bed and yawned. Tooru looked at him like he was insane. "What? Do you have a better idea? I’m not sleeping on the floor."

“Fine." Oikawa put a few pillows in the middle of the mattress and pointed at Kuroo. "That's your side." After that, he laid himself down and pulled up the covers. "And this is mine. Try not to ruin my work during the night." He closed his eyes and turned his back to Kuroo. 

"Try not to snore a lot or I'll make sure to kick your ass through the pillows." 

"Very threatening. Goodnight,  _ honey _ ." Tooru settled on his pillow and let out a hum. Tetsuro wasn't going to be outdone. 

"Sweet dreams to you too,  _ sweetheart. _ "

* * *

The first thing Tooru noticed when he woke up was the strong scent of strawberries and some sort of fabric tickling his nose. He opened his eyes and almost screamed. 

Maybe Tooru was just cursed. Why did he have to end up cuddling with  _ Kuroo _ out of all people? and why did he have to miraculously tangle all of his limbs with Kuroo's without any emergency exit? God was testing him and Tooru wasn't having  _ any  _ of this. Of course he'd love to untangle himself and leave the room but that would mean waking Tetsuro up, and he was sleeping really peacefully. Also, it was six in the morning and he'd rather stay in bed than watch TV on the hard couch. He'd have to deal with that for now.  _ Just don't think it's Kuroo you're hugging.  _ Yes, that should help. Maybe he'll eventually go to sleep again and won't have to worry about anything. 

Tooru closed his eyes again in hopes of falling asleep; he was tired, it was six and the sound of Kuroo's breathing was making him weirdly relaxed. Perfect conditions for sleeping. Or so he thought, because Kuroo's terrible self decided to hide his face in Oikawa's neck in his sleep.  _ Well fuck,  _ there goes the rest of tiredness he felt. 

Now, laying wide awake with your best friend almost kissing your neck wasn't exactly Tooru's thing. Even if they smelled like strawberries and were really warm. He came up with an almost flawless strategy — if he wakes Kuroo up but acts like he did it by accident in his sleep, it's going to solve the problem. 

He decided to kick Kuroo in the stomach, hoping that would work. the volleyball god had to be on his side, because Tetsuro groaned and slowly opened his eyes. Tooru quickly pretended to be asleep, putting on his most peaceful expression. He heard Kuroo mutter a curse and sigh. 

"Oi, Tooru, wake up." Tetsuro's face was  _ too close _ . His breath tickled Tooru's cheek and the raspy tone of his voice made his skin shiver. When Oikawa yawned in response, he got  _ even closer, which _ was doing dangerous things to Tooru's heart rate. No one has been in such a domestic situation with him since… since Hajime. And the magic was gone. 

“I told you not to ruin my pillow wall, asshole." He took his hand from under Tetsuro and stretched. 

"It was  _ you _ who glued himself to me in the middle of the night." Wait a minute. Kuroo  _ knew _ Oikawa was hugging him and didn't push him off? 

"And you just went with it?" 

"Firstly, go with the flow. Secondly, you looked like you were having a nightmare and held my arm so hard you left me a bruise. Fucking volleyball muscles." Tetsuro sat up and touched his hair. He didn't have a chance to sandwich his head between pillows tonight, so it was fully down, covering most of his eyes. He looked… handsome. 

" _ Oh.  _ Sorry." 

"No worries. Anyway, I’m gonna go to the bathroom before anyone else gets the same idea." 

Once the door closed, Tooru fell back onto the pillows. The whole bed smelled like strawberries.  _ He  _ smelled like strawberries. The side Kuroo slept on was still warm, sheets messy and illuminated by the light falling into the room from behind the curtains, like it was inviting him to just stay in bed all day. 

He shook his head and sat up. He should probably pick up clothes for today because Kuroo brought  _ terrible _ button ups with himself.

* * *

Breakfast was the first occasion to show off their acting skills. Tetsuro tried to remember most of the cliche scenes he saw in movies to make sure Tooru's family knew they were a perfect match. 

"So," Himari played with her food, "how did you end up together?" The rest of the family involuntary looked in their direction 

Kuroo cleared his throat and smiled, trying not to think about how many people are expecting to hear their supposed love story. "I guess you could say he had me at  _ hello. _ " He heard Tooru snort next to him and immediately felt a confidence boost. "After months of crushing I finally got my stuff together and asked him during practice. His serves were  _ awful _ after that." Soon, everyone at the table was laughing. 

"He's not telling you the whole truth! It was way more embarrassing! He was in charge of hanging up our team's banner after it got cleaned up. Once he was about to, he screamed my name and revealed a big _Will you go out with me?_ banner in front of the whole team! I felt like jumping out of the window." Tooru puffed his cheeks. 

"That's so sweet! Why didn't you tell us earlier, To-chan?" His mom clapped her hands and sent them a warm smile. Kuroo felt a little bad for lying. 

"Oh, I guess I was so busy with school I totally forgot! But at least we can spend Christmas together! Right, Tetsu?" Tooru turned around and smiled the same way his mom did — the similarity was almost scary. Tetsuro did the same though and squeezed Tooru's hand under the table. It might've been unnecessary since no one saw the gesture, but Kuroo liked to be authentic. He hoped no one saw his eyes widen at the new nickname. 

"Right. I'm really happy to finally meet your family, especially now that we're engaged." He hoped he didn't sound too fake. Judging from everyone's expression though, he did a good job. One point to Tetsuro. 

"But isn't it too soon for the engagement? You've been together for six months only." One of the aunts chimed in. Finally, the question Kuroo was the most prepared to answer. 

"Well, i think that when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible. There's no need to wait years for something you're sure about."

Tooru thanked the volleyball god that he was supposed to smile, because he was close to bursting into laughter because of the  _ When Harry met Sally  _ quote. Since when was Kuroo so funny? He propped his head on his hand and sighed, probably giving others the idea of how smitten he was. Not that he was actually smitten, of course. 

He realized his family probably wanted him to say something on the matter too when Kuroo kicked him slightly under the table. Clearing his throat, he looked in the direction where his aunt was sitting. "I agree with Tetsu." 

"Oh, enough of that! Tooru, can you please bring me sugar from the kitchen?" Tooru's mom waited until he was out of hearing distance and then turned to Kuroo. Tetsuro felt like he was just caught by a predator with no chance of escaping. "So, Tetsu-kun, what made you like our Tooru?"

Kuroo knew he might get asked about that, except he assumed it would be in front of Tooru, who would act flustered and turn the question down. 

It was basically like describing a friend, right? 

"There's… a lot, besides the fact that he's handsome, of course." He earned a small laugh from Himari. "He's very dedicated to what he does and gives it his all, he's also very kind and ever since we've met he helped me a lot with school and life problems. And he's very funny. There's many more things I can say, but I think I don't have the time anymore." Tooru entered the room again, scanning the smiles on his family's faces. 

"What were you talking about? You looked like I just interrupted something.” He took his seat and took a bite of his food.

"Forbidden knowledge. You'll know soon, though." Tetsuro was  _ not _ about to tell Tooru that he just praised him in front of his whole family, so he decided to make something up later. 

"Meanie." 

"You still love me." Tooru turned away and… Blushed? No, Kuroo's mind was probably just playing tricks on him. "Anyway, why are you staring at me so much today?" he added in a hushed tone when the rest of the family changed the topic. 

"Your hair looks different, that's all. Now eat before it gets cold."

* * *

They only had one and a half days left to play a lovely couple and Tooru was counting down the hours until the 25th. So far nothing bad happened, but being in close proximity to Tetsuro was making him dangerously flustered lately. And that was a problem because Tooru would definitely blow their cover if his heart was running a treadmill. 

And it seemed like something wanted to test him by putting him and Tetsuro under a mistletoe in front of at least four people. 

He tried telling himself it was  _ fine  _ and that he only needed to quickly peck Kuroo so they could get it over with. And that's what he would do if Kuroo wasn't so close to his face, his eyes closed and one hand on Tooru's waist.  _ Too close.  _ Tooru sucked in a breath; he was in the middle of hoping it didn't really look like a first kiss, when Kuroo lifted a Christmas card standing close and covered their faces with it. Thanks, universe. 

Kuroo tried not to show how weird he felt by the distance between them. Tooru's warm breath ghosted over his face. He could probably count Tooru's eyelashes or try to look at every freckle he had for a longer second but that would be  _ way  _ too weird, so he settled on looking straight into Oikawa's eyes. Which, after a second thought, was a bad idea. 

That might've been the most intense second (or two) in his life, if he was being honest. Tooru's eyes always looked as if he was staring right into someone's soul, which was a good tool during a game, but a very creepy thing in real life. And it (only theoretically) made Kuroo blush. The latter seemed rather unbothered by the whole thing, which was a good sign for Tetsuro. 

He brought the card down and smiled, taking his hand off Tooru's waist. He heard Himari sigh — speaking of which, didn't she have anything else to do besides always being in the same room as them? — but everyone else just smiled at them, which meant they weren't being awkward at all. And even if they were, they seemed to be so happy that no one dared to comment. 

Tooru ran away to the kitchen under the excuse of helping his mom cook, and Tetsuro was left standing under the stairs like an idiot. He probably would stay there longer, if it wasn't for Tooru's grandma calling him from upstairs.

She welcomed him to her room with a wide smile (Kuroo was sure it was identical for the whole family) and made him sit down in one of the two armchairs in the corner. Was she going to play the bad cop? 

"Good thing Tooru's not glued to you today. I have a surprise." She took the other seat and pulled some kind of a book from under the small table and opened it in the middle. "These are from my own engagement day." She handed the book to him, Kuroo realizing it's a photo album. 

Tooru's grandma got engaged on Christmas. Great, Tetsuro made the whole act sentimental and important without even knowing. He went through the photos; the young couple was captured in different situations, from the woman showing off her ring to cooking something together. 

"I met Tooru's grandfather on a trip my friends organised. I thought he was a show off at first, but I quickly changed my mind.” The next set of pictures showed preparations before the wedding. "He turned out to be one of the kindest people I've met. I didn't even realize when I fell for him." Wedding day. Smiling couple holding hands. 

The happiness radiating from every page made Kuroo… jealous. Will he ever be able to have something like that? And if yes, then when? And with who? 

"But I don't think you want to hear my love story. All I'm saying is," she took Tetsuro's hands in hers, "I hope you'll be able to be happy despite what life throws at you. And if you put love into whatever you're doing, it's going to work out." She gave Kuroo something small and cold and let go, leaning back into her armchair. 

Kuroo’s eyes stung after he opened his hand and saw a small wedding ring. There was no way he could take it. "It was his once. We thought he'd lost it, but after his death I found it in the closet." 

He felt like he just stole something that happens once in a lifetime, something so meaningful that it couldn't be repeated ever again. At one point he wanted to just confess how it all wasn't true, how she should stop talking and save this conversation for someone else, someone who'll really be Tooru's fiance, someone who'll  _ deserve _ it. 

“I… don't think I can take it. It's something really precious, I shouldn't, really."

"Don't be so shy, sweetie. You're part of the family now! He'd want you to have it. Now, go help your fiance or he's going to break his arms trying to carry all those gifts to the tree."

Tetsuro stood up and saw Tooru making his way through the room downstairs, laughing at something his nephew said while trying not to drop a whole bunch of packages. 

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"How… How did you know you were really in love?" 

"When I realised I can't imagine a life without him in it. That I will be truly alone once he's gone." 

"Thank you… Grandma." She only smiled at him and gestured for him to go downstairs, because Tooru  _ really  _ needed help getting rid of the kids that wanted to see what was inside the gift boxes.

* * *

Tooru suggested they get some fresh air in the evening and that's how Kuroo ended up clutching the barricade around the ice rink. 

The place was big and mostly empty, except for them, a group of high school girls and a couple with a kid, which was good because he didn't have to feel embarrassed, but also meant a lot of silence. And silence meant being one on one with his thoughts. Thoughts about  _ Oikawa Tooru  _ out of everything that was happening in his life. 

Ever since they started this whole act Kuroo had to ask himself a few times if he really was  _ pretending  _ to be in love with Tooru. Grandma's words didn't exactly help him figure it out. 

Would he feel alone once Oikawa was out of his life? He would definitely miss him, but to the point of feeling truly alone? That was debatable. once he thought he wouldn't be able to live without Kenma, but he turned out to be doing just fine after graduating and living on his own (and later with Tooru). 

Tooru was a different story, though; he didn't live with Kenma for around three years. It would definitely be weird to suddenly have him disappear; their flat would feel empty without him dancing around while cleaning or laughing at stupid videos Kuroo sent him. The place would also stop smelling like citruses and become way more quiet. 

But he could live with that. Could live without Tooru's laugh. Or his awful singing. or his citrus hygiene products. Or the way Tooru's eyes lit up whenever he was happy. Or how he got excited over the smallest things. Or the way he threw his head on Kuroo's shoulder when he laughed. Or how he fell asleep hugging his arm during a movie night. Or his smile when they made a successful attack during a match. Or how—

He didn't even realize when he let go of the barricade and collided with the other. They fell over, Oikawa landing with a quiet thud. 

It was the second time that day that they've come close to kissing and Tetsuro almost leaned in this time, if it wasn't for how captivating Tooru's eyes were; big, round and shining, made people want to stare into them but also turn their gaze away immediately. 

When he caught his eyes coming down to look at Oikawa's lips, he quickly stood up and cleared his throat. 

_ Oh.  _

Okay, he maybe did have an itty bitty tiny crush on his best friend, but that was fine. He was fine. Hecould ignore it until they were back home and then he was going to just live in denial until Oikawa finds someone new. He'll  _ have _ to, because if Tooru ever found out, he was going to think Kuroo took advantage of this whole thing.

* * *

Tetsuro was ignoring him for the whole walk back home, and then only muttered a  _ goodnight  _ when he went to sleep. Did Tooru do something wrong? He really hoped he didn't, nor that his family annoyed Kuroo (and he knew they were able to). 

Luckily, it was their last day and maybe they could explain everything to each other once they were home, away from the prying eyes of his family everywhere they went. He knew they shouldn't have dont this, knew it would end up ruining their friendship in some way. 

He sat on a couch and sighed, hiding his face in his hands. 

"Trouble in paradise? On Christmas day?" Himari jumped on a seat next to him, crossing her legs and smiling. 

"Shut up. And it's not trouble, we're just tired from all the Christmas preparations. People have the right to feel like this, you know?"

The girl pretended to think hard about something and then giggled. "You know what  _ really  _ helps to forget about all the tiring stuff? A good old snowball fight. The kids are outside already. You can get Tetsuro-kun and have fun." And with that she was gone. 

Kuroo was upstairs, reading a book Tooru's grandma gave him. He looked so calm that Tooru felt bad for interrupting him. Either way, he cleared his throat. "Hey."

Kuroo looked up and Oikawa mentally let out a sigh of relief when he was met with a small smile. "Hi." 

"I, uh. Did something happen yesterday? I know how my family or I can get, so if anyone made you upset or uncomfortable, I’m sorry. It's just that we didn't talk a lot these past few days unless it was evening, and we were both pretty tired then anyway and I don't know how you feel about this whole thing and—" He didn't even realize when Tetsuro stood up and put a hand on his shoulder. 

"Hey, Oikawa. It's fine, really. I was just really tired yesterday and you know how much I hate skating. Everything's okay, I promise. You know that if it wasn't I would tell you immediately. That's what we agreed on, right?" Tooru nodded. "Exactly. Is that all?"

"Actually, the kids are having a snowball fight and I thought we could join and show them how it's done." They exchanged smirks. 

"Let's go."

And that's how hours later Tooru was soaking wet with snow both outside and inside his jacket, running after an even worse-looking Kuroo. Were they risking pneumonia? Probably. Did it really matter to Tooru? Not really, since he could spend time with Tetsuro without worrying about anything.

* * *

The dinner was going great; no one asked them any uncomfortable questions, Kuroo ate a lot of his favorite food and the atmosphere seemed to be way lighter than earlier. They deserved it for those few days of torture. 

He stretched and hummed, putting one of his arms around Tooru's shoulders (in a totally fake fiances way, because he  _ didn't  _ have a crush on Tooru) and smiling widely. Some of the kids were already buzzing with excitement looking at the colorful bunch of presents under the christmas tree. 

"Mommy, can we open them already? We ate everything and all!" Akari bounced up and down on the chair. Tetsuro figured out she was some kind of a leader among the other kids; it was always her who spoke the loudest and led the others while doing something. 

Her mother let out a sigh and nodded. The kids busied themselves with unwrapping the gifts, while the rest of the family started freely roaming the room, talking with each other. The amount of people was way larger than how it felt to Kuroo at first; probably because he hadn't had the chance to see all of them in the same place before. 

The atmosphere made him feel like he was at home, and for the first time in a few years Tetsuro  _ wanted  _ to be a part of the celebration. Ever since his parents got divorced, Christmas was a moving holiday. He'd spent half of it at his dad's place and the other at his mom's, travelling from one place to another making him too tired to have fun at all. 

Tooru smiled at him and excused himself to go to the bathroom. Kuroo nodded and was about to go help Takeru with a lego set he got, when Tooru's phone caught his eye. Now, Tetsuro wasn't the nosy type, but Oikawa didn't lock it, and the contact name at the top of the screen made his blood boil. 

_ Iwaizumi Hajime _ . and under that, a sentence that singlehandedly ruined Tetsuro's mood.  _ Wish you were here.  _ Sent by Tooru just a few minutes ago. 

"Moved on" his ass. His assumptions from earlier were true: he  _ was  _ a replacement. Kuroo wanted to just start screaming in the middle of the room. Of course he knew he couldn't control what Tooru felt, but why did he lie? Why couldn't he just tell him the true reason for this whole pretend game? Maybe he wouldn't be as annoyed if he hadn't figured out his feelings for Tooru a day ago. 

Kuroo took a deep breath. It's going to be fine, he just needs to sort everything out with himself first. He stood up and told Tooru's grandma he was going out for a quick walk, that he needed some air. She just looked at him as if she knew something was up and smiled.

* * *

When he came back from the bathroom, Tooru noticed Kuroo was gone. Even more, his phone was tilted towards Tetsuro's seat and the chair looked like it was pulled back in a hurry. Oh god, did he leave his messages open? If he did and Kuroo read the last one, he was simply fucked. 

Probably only one person in the entire house knew where the other man was, so Tooru wasted no time and went to the kitchen. "Grandma, where's Ku— Tetsu?" 

"He said he needed to go on a quick walk to catch some fresh air. Did something happen? You seem stressed." She took a bite of her piece of cake. 

"No, nothing. I'm going to join him, if anyone asks." 

He was out of the house in no time, trying to make out Kuroo's silhouette in the dark. Luckily, the other man hasn't gone that far yet, even though he was walking quickly. Tooru scampered in his direction, the snow making it difficult. 

"Hey! did something happen?" He tried to make up for the distance with the loud tone of his voice. It seemed to either have no impact, or Kuroo was just simply ignoring him. 

"Oi, Kuroo!" Catching his breath became difficult, as the cold winter air made its way into his lungs. "If it's about the message, I can explain! Just stop for a second!" Still no reply, and Kuroo seemed to speed up. 

"Oh, for the love of—  _ Tetsuro _ !" The taller man stopped and turned around into Tooru's direction so fast he couldn't pick up what was happening. 

"I never stood a chance, did I?" 

Tooru stopped in his tracks.  _ What?  _ "What are you talking about?" 

Well, since Tetsuro fucked up already, he might as well tell him the rest.

"Against Iwaizumi. I was just a replacement this whole time, right?" Tooru opened his mouth to say something, but he was cut off. "And i'm not talking about… Whatever we've been doing for those few days. Ever since you two broke up, you've become awfully close with me, like you needed someone to fill the best friend's place in your life. And that would be  _ fine,  _ but you hid so much from me. I don't know if anything you've told in these past few months was true." His voice got quiet at the end, as if he himself didn't want to believe what he was saying. 

"I—" 

"Am i wrong?"  _ Please tell me I'm wrong.  _

"It's not what you think! It's just that—"

"I just want a simple answer, Tooru"

"Oh my God, will you shut up for a minute?!” Tooru startled himself with the tone of his voice. "I said it's not what you think because I made up with Hajime two weeks ago and we were talking about the winter tournament going on near my house that we wanted to go to, but he won't be back until next month. And  _ of course _ we became closer after I got dumped, because I finally had time to spend with you! And why are you so mad, I thought you agreed to this?” 

"Because i'm in love with you, idiot!" 

_ Oh.  _

Tooru felt like he got slapped. Kuroo Tetsuro was in  _ love  _ with him? For the whole time? Without pretending? 

Well, since the latter came to that conclusion, maybe it was also time for Tooru to finally accept what he was trying to run away from for a year and a half. The real reason why he asked Kuroo to come with him. 

Time to finally admit to himself that after he met Kuroo, every time he kissed Hajime he imagined someone else's lips on his, someone else's hands holding his. That  _ he _ was the one that broke up, because telling his family he was in love with Iwaizumi when he clearly wasn't anymore would just be cruel. 

Maybe it was finally time to admit that he was in love with Kuroo Tetsuro.

Fuck it. "I might not get another chance to say this, so I’ll just get it over with. I never told you anything about my relationship because I wanted it to be  _ you  _ the whole time I was dating Hajime. Yes, coming here with you was my plan to show my family I have everything under control, but I also felt like it would let me have  _ something  _ with you, even if it was just a lie." 

"Both of us took quite the detour, didn't we?" Kuroo chuckled. 

In a matter of seconds, Tooru was in front of Tetsuro, holding his face in his hands and  _ finally _ kissing him.

The time seemed to stop. The cold ring was embedding itself into Kuroo's cheek, the kiss itself was rushed, a bit awkward and sloppy, and he couldn't feel his nose or legs because of the cold but none of these things mattered because Tooru was  _ here _ and he felt the same as Tetsuro. 

"So," Tooru panted when they parted for air, "does this count as a Christmas gift? Because if not, I have bad news." 

Tetsuro laughed. "You're lucky you're cute."

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed this mess <3


End file.
